Sleeping Woes

I feel blah today. I suppose it is the lack of sleep. I honestly don't believe my true self can come out. The exhausted, cranky, irritable self is very strong and overtaking the real me. Almost like a cranky monster, per say. Hayley is almost 6 months old, on the 17th, and she has not slept through the night. Once, maybe twice, she slept for about 5 hours, and that was so long ago I can't even remember. It is all such a blur. Hayley's poor sleeping habits is really starting to get to me. I have read on the Internet a lot about this and no, she is not a bad sleeper, she just has bad sleeping habits. So it is time to teach her new habits. I was given 2 sleeping baby books, one from cousin Dawn and one from friend Sarah, and neither of them are working for me, and I don't fault the books, I fault my weakness for my crying baby. I hate letting her cry, and I am now at the point where I am over it. I am ready to let her cry if that's what it takes. We tried once, and she came down with a cold, then an ear infection, and blah blah blah - here we are today. Since Christmas we have given in and put her to bed with us. Last night, she was thrashing around kicking me so much I think I slept for maybe an hour total. So that will be the end of that.

A couple things, first of all, I just want to say that we have tried everything people have advised us to try. And over and over again we've tried. Don't pick her up, pick her up, let her cry, don't let her cry, no nightlight, put her in the crib awake, sleepy, asleep. Play music, make it noisy, make it quiet. Swaddle, no swaddle, half swaddle. Lovey, pacifier. You name it, we tried it. We are giving her cereal to make her full, we've tried a bottle instead of nursing, just nursing, combining both. We have established a bed time routine so she knows it's bedtime. We have mimicked everything in our room that she could love, with the exception of us being in her room, for the fact that she sleeps in our bed just fine even when we aren't there. We put a fluffy blanket under her sheet. We tried the room warm, cool. Putting her down earlier, keeping her up longer. We have tried everything!

Secondly, all these books and all this advice I'm finding, is for a baby who has a hard time falling asleep. Well Hayley has no problem falling asleep. She does that just fine. She has a problem staying asleep. This is usually what happens: about 7ish I nurse her until she is really sleepy. Then I swaddle her up and give her her pacifier. Then I put her in her crib and she goes right to sleep. Then anywhere between 5 minutes and an hour later she wakes up. Usually because she has lost her pacifier. We go in and give it to her. Then she will go to sleep again for 30 minutes to an hour and then wake up crying again. At this point, she is done. She absolutely refuses to go back to sleep unless we pick her up. The moment we pick her up, she stops crying and within 5 minutes, fall back to sleep in our arms. We put her back in the crib and the cycle goes all over again. This will go all night long until I nurse her around 1 (if she doesn't insist I nurse sooner. Sometimes I find myself nursing her every 2 hours). Then maybe she'll sleep for 3 hours, then wake to nurse again, then she wants to play, then about a half hour later, get her back to sleep until 7:30. What I have just explained is a good night. I won't even get into the bad nights.

I ask myself what are we doing wrong? Why is this happening? What can we do better?

Well today is December 30th and I am making it my New Years Resolution to get my child sleeping through the night. Unfortunately, she has a minor cold, but when this is through, I am done with these games. I need to sleep. I am beyond exhausted. Is there a name for what I am feeling right now? Besides desperate.

Stay tuned...hopefully next time I post a rant, it will be a rant of joy for my sleeping baby.

Hayley's First Christmas

Hayley had a wonderful first Christmas. It started on Christmas Eve at the Big House where my mom's family all got together and she got lots of clothes and toys from everyone! My Uncle David loved her and held her almost all night. She was so cozy in his arms she just closed her eyes and dozed in the middle of the party! Then we stayed there that night and spent Christmas morning and day at my mom's. I know there are a ton of pictures in this post, but it was a long weekend. Here's me and Hayley at 7 a.m. She, Antina, and I were the only ones up.

Of course, I couldn't wait, so I opened the big present for Hayley first. This is her riding on her snail that Mom and Pops got for her. I got it on video as well, but forgot my video camera cord, so it's not posted.

Christmas Eve we were all in our matching PJ's. Usually Mom is in this picture but she was sick in bed instead.
Another gift from Grandma and Pops, a hat with antlers. Hayley really didn't care about the gifts, but she LOVED all the paper. She was licking the paper until it was so soggy, and we had to take it away. Then she's just reach for a new piece. She carried around soggy wrapping paper all day.

Playing with her Taggie Elephant that Santa brought her. She loves it!

Again, she had to taste the bow...Everything she sees she tries to eat.

A good family picture on Sunday morning.

Friday night she tried on the hat from Mimi and Grandpa. Aimee put a bow on top. It looked hysterical!

Modeling her new dress from Nana. Also showing off that she can sit up on her own now!

Her Johnny Jumper went crashing to the ground with her in it on Christmas morning. Thank God she was totally fine and got off with a minor bump on her head, but after that, Pops set it up reinforced, tied to rope, and he hung on the rope himself to ensure it was stable. I guess she didn't remember because she's back in it a day later.

Mommy, I want a sip of your wine! She has been grabbing at all our cups and food since we started her on solids. This weekend she got a ladybug cup from my mom and she has been learning to drink from that, but she wants ours.

Bug Eyes!

On Sunday Dave and I hosted the Oakes Family Christmas, back from retirement, and there were about 25 people at our house, including children. It was such a blast. Thank goodness it was 60 degrees outside because the kids were in and out and in the backyard and in the basement and everywhere else. But we all seemed to fit just fine in our place. Lots of food and Harvey Wallbangers and music. We did a quick ornament exchange and actually fit every single person, including Hayley, into our living room to pick their gift.

Here is Hayley doing tummy time and listening to the music. She was also Dave's drum.

Here she is smiling, playing, and enjoying the music on the floor. It was so hot in our house, she ended the day in nothing but her diaper.

It really looks like she's singing in this one!

Dad and Ann singing and playing guitar. I didn't get a picture of it, but Jade also played the guitar and she is really good! I had never heard her before.

This was a bit earlier in the day, Grandpa needed a quick nap on the sofa. Let me also note that there were screaming children tearing through this room at the same time he snoozed away.

My mom got matching dresses for Hayley and Nora. We tried our best to get a good picture of the 2 of them...Here are our best attempts...

I just want to say that Hayley's first Christmas was certainly a memorable one. We had a wonderful weekend and it was so nice that Dave didn't have to work and he could be home with us. Also having Dad and Ann and the girls and Jacob and Nora there made it special. Asha was home working, and she was certainly missed, especially by me.

If I get time to upload videos later this week, I will do so. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone!

A Late Thanksgiving Picture

I know it's late, but I just got this picture and I love it. My favorite family picture yet!
Hopefully we'll get some good ones for Christmas. By the way, there are so many presents under our tree addressed to our 5 month old, it's crazy. Dave won't let me open one of them until tomorrow!

New Pictures at 5 Months

Here are some cute pictures of Hayley. Can you believe she's 5 months old already!

She hasn't yet rolled again, but when she's on her tummy she is trying, everytime. She can sit up on her own now, but after about 30 seconds she tips over.

Hayley loves paper. Here she is ripping up my Parent's Magazine.

It's so easy to catch her in a smile now. I say "Hayley Smile!" and she looks up at me and smiles.

Merry Christmas Eve

Tomorrow will be Hayley's first Christmas. We are off to the Big House tonight and can't wait. I know Hayley has no idea what it's about, but I am excited for her at least.

Here is her picture with Santa, unfortunately it did not scan too well.

Here are a couple of the professional pictures we had of her taken in the last month. The first one is totally my favorite!!

Merry Christmas Eve everyone!

First Food!

We decided it was time to start Hayley on cereal. For weeks now she has been grabbing at our dinner plates and trying to drink our beverages. She was so excited to eat on her own! I am so glad we started it. She ate every bite and wanted more. Then I gave her the bowl to play with. She loved the spoon and kept grabbing it from me. Finally I gave her her own spoon and fed her with another one. This was quite difficult since she kept sticking it in her mouth. But overall it was very sucessful. She got cereal all over herself but ate a lot too. She was so happy!

It has been over a week now since she first ate cereal and now we are giving her pears mixed with her cereal. She LOVES the pears. I can't wait to start giving her new things...This is just such a new adventure. Here are some pictures to record the moment.

Wrapping presents

The other day I was wrapping presents and Hayley wanted to help! She was holding the ribbon!

Playing Naked

Hayley loves to be naked. It must be a baby thing, but the moment the diaper is off, HUGE smiles. I gave her some naked time the other day and of course, had to capture it on film.

This duck plays a lullaby. As soon as I wind it up she stares at it and I swear she's learning the tune to sing along. It is just so adorable. If I could figure out how to upload videos on here, I would show you that, too.

Getting the Tree

Excuse the delay, I am catching up on blogs today. Last Saturday, we went and got our tree. As tradition, Pops and I always go and get them together. We love our tree farm and always get fraser fir and there are so many pretty ones, it is so hard to choose. Of course, Hayley came this year, and we had to capture her first Christmas tree moment in pictures!

Pops cutting down our tree!

Standing in front of the one we picked out for The Big House

Hayley is 4 months old!

Hi All,
I know it's been forever, but finding the time to post is getting few and far between these days. Hayley was 4 months on the 17th and we had her 4 month check up on the 28th. She weighed in at 16 pounds 14 ounces and is 26 inches long. She is in the 97th percentile of babies her age, therefore, yes, people, she's huge. Well, she is very healthy. I always knew I'd have a chubby baby. Dave and I are loving every minute of every ounce of her, and parenthood is still amazing, though challenging. After her appointment, she has come down with quite a cold. She has a stuffy nose, bad cough, and a fluxuating fever from 99.5-101.5. I am really glad Dave is off this weekend to help me take care of her because she has been ultimately fussy and cranky and pretty much doesn't want to be put down. I'm sure it is the first of many of her colds to come. Otherwise, she is fantastic and has a great demeanor about her and so much fun to play with. She is so into everything and grabs and wants to eat it all. The doctor asked us to wait on giving her cereal just yet since she is so big already, so we're probably going to hold off again for another month or so.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and hopefully it won't be so long for my next post again. Here are some new pictures of the last couple weeks.

Hayley watching the fire.

The first time in the high chair. She liked it!

Hanging with mom while I do laundry

Daddy's first day alone with Hayley. She just took a really big poop.

Bathtime pics!

She's so cute when she sleeps!

Hayley and Josie having a moment.

Sitting in my bumbo chair!